Can top NYC caterers really customize your menu?
If you’re planning a wedding in New York City, you’ll eventually ask two questions: What will this really cost? And Can we actually have the wedding we want? Most caterers can answer the first question. Fewer are honest about the second because at a lot of places, the answer is “hmm let me ask my manager,” and then a disappointing no. Â
At Bartleby & Sage our entire team are empowered to say yes, so no matter your request, we pride ourselves on finding a way to make it happen. We have flown in crawfish from New Orleans for a themed wedding; we have ordered the famous Burnt Almond Torte from Prantls’ Bakery in Pittsburgh for a couple who met there during college; heck we have even recreated the menu a couple had on their first date. Â
After 30+ years of catering weddings across this city, I find that the difference between a good caterer and the right caterer usually comes down to one thing: How they respond when a couple asks for something personal, the details that will make their wedding unmistakably their own.
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The “No” you’ll hear from other NYC caterers
A lot of our couples already have proposals from other caterers before they meet us. When they tell us what they’ve heard, it’s easy to spot the hidden “no” and hidden costs:
- “That’s a separate station, with a design fee.” Passed hors d’oeuvres and one included station are pretty standard. Ask for a second station, or two distinct cultural menus instead of one, and you’ll often get a whopping add-on charge.
- “We can’t do ribeye for a group this size.” It’s a notoriously hard cut to cook to temperature at scale, so many kitchens won’t even attempt it. Our master chefs love a steak challenge and nail it every time. Â
- “You need to hire your own cake vendor.” The wedding cake is one of the most commonly excluded items in full-service catering packages—even at higher price points. Our pastry team will design a cake based on your vision and it’s included in the pricing.
- “Our team will only work with a planner.” Some of the most expensive caterers in the city require you to hire a wedding planner in order to book them. That’s a considerable expense, and it won’t be reflected in the catering estimate. At Bartleby & Sage we do a lot of the basic planning with you, and you can DIY the rest or hire a planner—or work with one of our experienced planners—but it is certainly not required.
To be clear: None of this makes other caterers bad at their jobs. It just means “full-service” doesn’t always mean “flexible.”
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Two weddings, two completely different menus
To demonstrate what we mean, let’s look at two real weddings we catered recently:
Wedding #1: An Italian-American bride, a Jewish-American groom, and a ribeye nobody else would consider
For their 150-guest wedding at The Wainwright House, the couple wanted a lot of meaningful food details, things other caterers had already balked at, starting with a ribeye add-on. (The bride’s father, who had passed away, always grilled perfect ribeyes at their summer house in Michigan) Our executive chef, Ramon, can cook it expertly for large groups, sourced from Millbrook Beef & Dairy, the most beautifully raised cows you’ll ever encounter. Â
The rest of the package told a similar story. Where some proposals nickel-and-dimed the couple for countless details, our base package  includes 7 passed hors d’oeuvres, a Tuscan grazing table, a plated first course and three mains, passed mini desserts, and a custom wedding cake (no separate baker required!). Add-ons like Oysters XO with roving shuckers, an espresso cart, and after-party pizza bagels with mini-bagels and mozz direct from Arthur Avenue’s Casa Della Mozzarella let the couple build the night exactly the way they wanted, without needing to contact multiple vendors to make it all happen because Bartleby and Sage handled it all.
We also went rental shopping with them—selecting linens and ballroom chairs together, in person. It’s a small thing, but it’s also the individual focus that not every caterer offers. And again, it meant one fewer vendor relationship to juggle.
Wedding #2: A Ukrainian bride, a Korean groom, and a menu that honored both
For a 100-guest wedding that would honor two distinct traditions, the couple didn’t want to favor one culture’s food over the other, and they didn’t want a fusion menu that watered down both. So we didn’t build one menu. We built two, side by side.
In one corner of the greenhouse at The Foundry, guests found a Ukrainian station with traditional borscht served in shot glasses, pelmeni with sour cream and horseradish, and mini-blini with caviar. In the other, a Korean station served black sesame chicken with gochujang glaze, beef bulgogi lettuce wraps, and kimchi pancakes. The passed hors d’oeuvres went playful and contemporary—deconstructed elote, 5-cheese mac and cheese bites in an edible parmesan spoon, ahi tuna tartare, even a smash burger—so cocktail hour felt like a distinct experience from the plated dinner that followed.
Speaking of cocktail hour, we created unique specialty cocktails named for the couple themselves. For the late-night festivities, we rented a popcorn cart to provide fresh, caramel, and cheesy popcorn to dance-famished guests.
Neither of these weddings looked anything like the other. That’s the point.
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The Real Costs of Custom Catering
When a wedding caterer can’t (or won’t) handle a request, the couple has two choices: Either give up their dream, or research, hire, and pay additional vendors who can take it on for them. It adds up financially, and it adds to the mental load of managing a wedding.
Judging by the proposals from other caterers our couples have shared with us, a comprehensive package that folds hors d’oeuvres, a station, dinner, cake, and staffing into one price is more the exception than the rule. Some caterers include just a handful of passed hors d’oeuvres, while others exclude a cocktail-hour station entirely—or add extra fees for design and staff. Cake is more often than not a third-party add-on.
None of this is a red flag, of course. Different caterers have different ways of doing business. But it’s worth considering these distinctions before you sign anything, so you can compare what’s actually included, not just the number at the bottom of the proposal.
At Bartleby & Sage, we want the menu planning and day-of as stress-free as possible, so we walk with you hand in hand from our first conversation to your wedding day. Â
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Frequently asked questions about hiring an NYC wedding caterer
Q: Do we need to hire a wedding planner to work with you?
A: No. We know some other high-end caterers require it, but we’ll work directly with couples—or we can recommend one of our planners or happily work with a planner if you already have one. The choice is yours.
Q: Can you really combine two distinct culinary traditions into one wedding?
A: Yes! And we’d rather build two distinct, well-executed menus than one diluted fusion menu that shortchanges both cultures.
Q: What if we want a dish other caterers say isn’t possible?
A: Ask us. Beef Wellington, jambalaya, and ribeye steak are some examples, but the bigger point is we’d rather figure out how to do something well than say it can’t be done.
Q: Do you charge extra for wedding cake?
A: No. Our culinary team includes a talented pastry chef, so a custom wedding cake is included in our standard package.
Q: Will you help us with rentals?
A: We’ll happily go rental shopping with you to select linens, chairs, whatever your venue doesn’t already provide. You won’t have to manage another vendor relationship on your own.
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Let’s Talk About Your Wedding
Whether you’re blending two cultures, chasing down a dish another caterer already said no to, or just trying to figure out what’s actually included in an estimate, we’d love to talk it through. Schedule a consultation, and let’s build a menu that’s actually yours
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